Tuesday, December 07, 2010

With sympathy, a country mourns

Not just the passing of a public figure, but merely a wife who has become an icon for what every wife (or spouse) desires from the person they married:

"I am imperfect in a million ways, but I always thought I was the kind of woman, the kind of wife to whom a husband would be faithful. I had asked for fidelity, begged for it, really, when we married. Leave me, if you must, but be faithful to me if you are with me." -- Elizabeth Edwards

Her trials have been manifold, having mourned the loss of her 16 year old son. Devastation, untold. Fighting multiple cancers while supporting a husband who decided to put his best interest as an individual forward above hers/theirs. Her story is not singular; for me, it puts a very universal stamp on the realities of life and marriage. The realities we've seen countless times and will continue to. Sometimes you don't get the upper hand of being taken advantage of. She didn't get to divorce her cheating husband and go on to find love with a man who would honor her (as far as we know).... but maybe that doesn't matter. She went on to have two more children after her son died, and while not replacing his presence, I'm sure they added joy unspeakable for the past twelve years. Her husband wronged her in the most despicable of ways, but perhaps, as friends and confidantes, her breaths getting shorter in recent weeks and days, it's not unreasonable to consider that maybe they made peace with the life they've shared together and the wrong that has taken place between the two of them. Her husband rationalized his decisions which affected his behavior (maybe) because of/(certainly) despite his wife's terminal illness, and must spend his remaining days carrying that load along his journey. I'd like to HOPE that the recent past few weeks or months allowed for them to gain closure and even, maybe, re-kindle a feeling of togetherness (in ways that the public will never know) before she passed from this life. She also had to rationalize and evaluate her involvement with him, and perhaps, even with planning to carry out a divorce from her husband, still was able to ultimately honor him and their marriage by passing away a month before the divorce was to be granted. Til Death, did they part. Not without pain, but a full life lived. Unconditional, it seems from my bird's eye view peeping in (as I know very little about the Edwards beyond headline news).

Though.... Having endured it all, I surely hope she's resting in the Lord's peace now.

No comments: